Olivia & Owen Fok

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Monday, February 13, 2017

Olivia - 47 months 6 days
Owen - 19 months 1 week 6 days 

I think I skipped the last monthly update. Might as well. Not that there's no significant events that happened, there were just that I am not sure where do I get it started. 

CNY. Usually we are not overly hyped because my in laws are not around, my relatives are mostly in Malaysia and we usually have simple non traditional CNY. Where most feasted on day 1, we have simple vegetarian meal prepared by yours truly. My sil took over on the second day with simple one dish meals also. Now, I can't rem what we did for day 3. I think we went to temple. 

Then, we made a very last minute decision to go Malaysia to visit my sick grandpa. Decided around 3pm, booked a private driver at 5pm and the next morning 5am off we went on a 8hour road trip. Why can't they increase the flight out to Ipoh? We stayed for 2 nights, hubby changed his Greece flight from Monday 120am to Tuesday 120am. When we got back on Monday evening, hubby had to pack for the next trip. Tiring it was. 

Just when I thought life is back to normal because I was thinking if I should go for a facial or what... Owen had fits in school. I was with Olivia and my family for breakfast. My knees went weak but brain could think proper. I called the clinic right away to expect me in an hour's time. I reached the school and Owen was laid sideways and the teacher was fanning him. When he finally cried, it meant a good thing means he was well enough to cry. It took me an hour to make him go into the car seat. Latched and tried repeat duno how many times. When he finally slept on the boobs I tried to transfer him but he stirred. After an hour I had to force him in and we made our way to the clinic. 

The pd called the respective doctors, the nurses tried to check for beds and Owen's pulse was taken. We went home supposedly to pack but Owen fell asleep for 2hours. In between, I wasn't sure to inform hubby because he's miles away but he ought to know. When he sent a message to ask about Owen's diarrhea, I got him to call me. I assured him things were alright because Owen really seemed to be better. Ching bought lunch for me and sent us to the hospital. While in the midst of processing the admission, the school called to say Olivia was vomiting. Clear headed as I was, the first thing was to call my pd. Pd said to send her to A&E since there's no one to take care of her. Part of the reason why I was calm was because I had Ching with me and my pd could make decisions for me. Ching settled Oli at the A&E while I went on to settle the ward and arrange Owen's drip to be started. Meanwhile, my pd called hubby to assure him that things were okay and she made her way to the hospital to see how were we doing. She came with toys for the kids and thankfully the toys kept them very well entertained. 

Every single thing from the drip to be administered for both, to feeding, to medication was a struggle. To be able to give the right amount of attention to both kids at the same time was even tougher. Struggle is real, every other thing was not important anymore. Exhaustion isn't something worth mentioning at all. When we were finally discharged after 2 nights, it meant another struggle because who is going to pin them down for me to feed that awful antibiotics? Miraculously, they were so cooperative. So rare. 

Our pd was very wonderful, really wonderful. She even made a trip down to the school to do a site visit and talked to the teachers who saw Owen collapsed. 

That pretty summed up an eventful cny. 

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Olivia - 46 months 3 weeks 1 day
Owen - 18 months 4 weeks 1 day

So so so lack of updates and missed oli's last monthly update. Today is 2nd day of CNY already. January, the new month to kickstart 2017 was a pretty scary one. There were a few bad news in the family. I am trying very hard holding up actually. Life, as it is, has to go on. 

With Oli turning 4 in March, I have started asking her about her likes for her birthday cakes because she's so fickle minded. From Sophia to Frozen to Peppa pig, she can't make up her mind. 

Oli has started her berries classes as well. On her first day, I sat in for 10mins and she was doing so well independently. 2nd lesson, she was hesitant to go, she wanted me to stay with her but the moment she reached the class, she ran in!?!? 3rd lesson she cried for a while (built up from the jealousy saga - let's talk later). The 4th one she said she doesn't like to go because she doesn't have any friends there. Despite all these, her mandarin has actually improved. Other than the weird accent, she has been talking about what she has learnt. I take it that she's fine with going Berries. 

Jealousy saga. With Owen started half day school, she wanted to go home mid day. She started throwing tantrums and the school feedback that she doesn't feel good when I picked Owen from school early. I seldom has this mummy guilt for any lack of attention given to either kids and when the owner told me that she knows oli well because she raised her up as well....that moment I knew I failed terribly as a mum. How can I not know? How can I take things for granted on my barely 4 year old daughter? 

As a result of these jealousy, she lost interest in school, Berries and her ballet. She said she never like school, never like Chinese lessons, never like ballet. She wants to stay at home with mummy. Omg. I brought her out once on 1 to 1 while Owen was in school. She was better afterwards but didn't last long and I don't want her to expect that to happen often. I was also busy with some personal stuff as well. At the same time, she needed to learn to manage the situation with my help of coz. Hence I also tried to pick her up from school without Owen and give her more attention during dinner time since Owen has early dinner. So far that's all I could do and not sure if I am doing it right. Sigh. 

Anyways, I am always trying very hard. Trying very hard to give in to her when it's ok to give in, trying to spend more time with her, trying to talk to her about how high need Owen is and basically, trying every single time. 

Sunday, January 01, 2017

The past few years have been rather great to end each year. Prior these 3 years, I was rushing my work to close the year end accounts. After 3 years of not working, I don't feel I have missed out anything, even money. I have gained so much intangibles and they are really no regrets. More importantly, both my kids complete me. 

A summary of 2016 that's worth mentioning. 

We went Bali in January. Actually I was quite defeated that our holidays are quite a failure because we were so tired managing both kids and especially oli, with her not eating most of the meals make me feel she's not ready for holidays afterall. Her tantrums that I don't even want to mention. 

In February, Owen progressed a little more in his solids intake with an introduction of porridge in his diet. Actually not so worth mentioning but if you have fussy kids accepting new food it feels like striking a small lottery. 

My firstborn is officially a threenager in March. Nuff said, what do you expect from a threenager or rather, how do you deal with a threenager at home?!?! 

In April, Owen has been tested for allergies and that was when I felt defeated again as a mum. I also worked harder to get this raw eczema wounds off from his face. 

In May, things have gone better. At least I think so, with Owen's eczema in much control. It was also then we booked tickets to Perth. It takes quite a bit of courage to bring a fussy eater and a lousy sleeper to a holiday. 

Owen turned 1 in June. We did quite a big celebration for him because last kid. Lol. Quite a few happenings in June because our maid left us overnight and my mil had to settle in at a nursing home. A whirlwind of thoughts, emotions and all.

The first week of July saw me managing 2 kids when oli's sch took a week off. We spent a lot of time together to the extend I was looking forward to her school closure in December. Our maid also arrived in mid July after much considerations, we would need a maid. One very big reason, Owen is still very clingy to me that I can't do anything, even today. July also means oli started her ballet classes and have been doing quite well and we are waiting for the next term in Jan2017 to start her ballet again. 

August seems like things have gotten on track at home so nothing worth to mention. We explored museums, did quite a bit of outdoor albeit the sunny hot weather.

September was fun! We spent 8days? in Perth. When we came back, Owen had showed signs of transitioning his naps to single one. It was only when I decided to leave him napping at home while I snuck out to have lunch with my friends. 

October, we celebrated daddy's birthday. While we decided we need to enjoy a peaceful dinner, we brought our maid along to manage the kids who nearly turned the restaurant upside down. 

November I turned 34. As I age, I stop asking myself what have I achieved because my family is all that matters. 

December is always a favorite month for me. With oli's great performance in her Julia Donaldson themed concert and me, giving her the leap of faith that she's really a grown up, I know this kid of mine is not a baby of mine again. Somehow, December is the month of nasty bugs and viruses. Both kids have been down for almost a month already. Also, we booked our tickets to Melbourne next March! 

And so, 2017 come what may because I have no resolutions as of now. Sleeping enough considered? 

Friday, December 30, 2016

Olivia - 45 months 3 weeks 2 days 
Owen - 18 months 

Look, someone is halfway to 2years old. 

The past 1 month I have been prepping myself mentally about him going to his little school. So much so that all I think, care and emo about was the separation anxiety and as of now, his bottles are not labelled, I forgot to ask how many diapers to pack, bag not set up, haven't decided if I should pack his lunch to school, how long can I stay with him in the class.. those logistics. 

He's going for half day programs anyways. Just that, I will miss those morning walks together. I am glad we made it for those morning walks when he sort of transited to single nap. Looking forward to more afternoon outings with him before he goes for full day program. 

Anyways the past 1 month we have been battling lots of nasty bugs and viruses and he's almost recovered but with all the parties and play dates he's back to square 1 now, with a full blown cough and flu. Not sure if he can even make it to school on Tuesday. 

Ok, let's don't talk about the worst food strike ever that lasted about 6 weeks. It has been very difficult and trying period for me. I cried, I lost it, felt so defeated and all. So.. just wish it wouldn't happen again because I don't want to deal with food strike anymore. 

Friday, December 09, 2016

Olivia - 45 months 2 days
Owen - 17 months 1 week 2 days 

2 days late. Again. Haha. Ok, this round was because I was running a low fever. I felt alright and energized actually, with a few aches here and there. This evening, I realized I have clogged duct even after 17 months of breastfeeding. That explains the fever? It's not painful just that lump hasn't gone away because the boy has been comfort latching. 

Faith restored and I am now swelling with pride and joy with my big baby because she's...

The gal who told me that she doesn't mind trying to go diaperless for naps and all has been well since then. 

The gal who told me she doesn't need a diaper to go on stage because there's toilets in the changing rooms (gan jiong mum here afraid she needed to pee while on stage). Last year, she already made it without diaper on stage why would she need 1 a year later? What was I thinking. 

The gal who asked me if I am going for her concert because she is performing on stage. No more shyness already.

The gal who allows drop off at ballet class with zero struggle even though I told her, her classmates were not attending on that day. 

The gal who is trying to bathe herself these days, making sure she's free of soap before she's out. I know she's playing with water after the real bathing. It's ok! 

The gal who constantly reminds the brother he's going to school in January. Like a 大家姐. 

The gal who made me realize I am such a bad mum and at the same time won me over by making me a proud mum. 

Happy 45th month my baby gal! 

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Olivia - 44 months 3 weeks 2 days
Owen - 17 months 

Today my boy turns 17 month old. As time creeps in, my heart beats a little faster, my breathing paused for a moment, feels a bit of runny nose (?) and probably shedding a tear or two. Because..... my baby is attending sch when he turns 18 month old. We are just 4-5 weeks away. 

My baby is bored at home, I tried to do activities with him but failed and I felt bad about it. He loves going out. He never fail to run to his shoes when I told him so. He loves to pick his sister up from school and he's always happy when I carries him out from the car seat at the carpark and he will point to the school and say jie jie. In the morning he unlatches the little school gate and sits on mat, trying to be part of the circle time. When we go for a car ride, he puts his tiny and yet chubby finger at he side of the car seat and leans towards the windows and watch the world goes by. When we goes to the parks, he looks out for dogs and swings both his hands to attempt to gain for their attention. He will say dogs! Woof woof! Today, before we reached our door step, he ran away to the direction of the playground and said "I want go". 

My boy is soon to reach the halfway mark to two year old. Time is such a horrible thing that makes us go crazy. 

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Olivia - 44 months 1 week 3 days
Owen - 16 months 2 weeks 3 days

Seriously so lack of updates. Oli turned 44 months 10 days ago and what have I been doing!?! 

And as they grow bigger, lesser updates too? Anyways, the throwing tantrums and meltdown days have died down a fair bit. Fair bit...means it's gg on still. 

One of the major tantrums was when she refused to leave the park and she pulled my shirt. The force was so great that she ended up slamming her face on the floor in the midst of the struggle. Sigh. 

Another one was she insisted to get a pair of slippers and a toy in a shop. We agreed to the slippers because she needed one but not the toy. One, it was very expensive and another was she doesn't need another toy. Also, she needs to learn that each time we go to a shop doesn't mean she gets to buy something every single time. Self control. Really lacking so must learn! 

So she cried all the way home and wanted me to remove her shoes. I refused and I needed to put Owen down for nap already. I chose to ignore her and she cried at the door. She removed her shoes and ran to the room and asked me to remove her shoes!?!? Crazy here. Got me even angrier and she went back to wear her shoes to get me to remove for her! So she got a few smack from his father on her thighs. 

So, here I have a strong willed (nicer to the ears) or rather a very brat gal in the making. Parenting is tough and when you fail to discipline your kids you feel you fail in parenting.